growing in the goo

but I was totally just reading personal ads on craigslist!!

Whenever I'm bored and reading the paper...usually on a Saturday while I'm eating lunch, I take a look at the personal ads. Not to find someone to date, but rather to kind of see how people describe themselves, what they're looking for in a mate. When I'm feeling particularly ambitious (and simultaneously aimless) I'll pair people up from the different columns. SWM in column five looking for a sensuous older woman? I've found your match in column three!

I've always wondered if they've checked out their fellow posters for a romantic connection before posting their own ad - I guess it would be their homework, romance course # 405. (A tiny) part of me has been tempted to call numbers to alert them to a possible match. I mean, what if their soul mate was looking for someone in the same paper? And they were so close to finding one another? Luckily I've been able to head off that temptation.

So tonight I was kinda bored, and after checking out the jobs that were posted today I decided to see who exactly was posting on the "men seeking women" list.

Oh my goodness. There are some doozies. One that especially....took my breath away, shall we say, was "Married Man looking for Married Woman." The post went on to say that the guy was married, but was looking to have an affair with a married woman. She must be married, so that they'd be equally invested in the "adventure." There was also a treatise written by some guy saying that women claim to want all these things, but when it comes down to it, he's the whole package, but no one dates him and he wants to know WHY NOT?!?!?

I wanted to tell that guy that perhaps he was coming on too strong and too bitter for any sane woman. But he hasn't written to my advice column, so I decided to leave that one be as well. There was another called "Will you be my substitute girlfriend?" Apparently this guy's girlfriend is abroad, and he's looking for someone to hang out with and have witty conversation on the weekends. Which is okay. We all need new friends! But calling her a substitute girlfriend?

Another one was titled "On my own, and a little lost! - 43" 43?! And he can't find his way around. Perhaps he meant that he was lost in the spiritual and emotional sense. Perhaps I'm too literal.

After reflecting on all of this, I've decided that I'm an awful person. These people are putting their hearts on the line, and I'm effectively taking my mom's meat tenderizer and pulverizing their (sometimes) good intentions. And who am I talk?

But there were a few cool people. And I'm going to post one of my favorite ads down below. If you want to date this character, go to craig's list, washington DC version, and he's under Wed. Aug 31.

Good luck everyone in the dating game! and be safe!

Looking for a geek girl - 27
I'm a computer programmer. I'd like to find a female who is also a programmer, be it c++, java, ASP.net, what have u, let's discuss programming methodologies and how we can shape our world through programming. R u pickin' up what I'm putting down. ok there's gotta be at least one female programmer out there, if so, gimme a holler, cuz I'm dying ta meetchya!