Tuesday, July 19, 2005


How important you are

I don't think you realize how much you can make someone's day, how important you truly are.

and no, I'm not addressing this to one person in particular. But to everyone. And this isn't one of those "oh, you're so special, smile!" things. This is a "Stop being selfish and think about those that love you" thing.

Think about it. There's probably someone in your life who would smile and light up inside because they know that you thought about them, and that you care. It might be a friend who is always e-mailing/calling you, and you take your sweet time to e-mail them back. It might be a younger sibling. It might be your grandma. Regardless of who it is, this person thinks the world of you, and is genuinely happy when you deign (because often that's what it is) to contact them. It's taking time out of your "Busy Schedule" and showing them that you care. Going that extra mile.

(Let me add here that I have done the above. I have "taken my sweet time" responding to someone, just because they really weren't my priority at the time....or a few days later....or one week later. I am 100 % guilty of this.)

And I put "busy schedule" in quotes, because you know what? All of us are busy. You can make time to talk to people too, even if you're running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Do you commute? Call the person on the phone when you're walking to your car, the bus, or the subway. Do you eat a lunch? Send a quick e-mail to the person before or after you unwrap your sandwich. Or even during. Chances are, they won't mind you chewing in their ear. Because they love you.

We live in the technology age. Call, text message, IM, e-mail, send flowers with a card, a carrier pigeon. Hell, even a letter. There's no excuse.

Perhaps I'm wrong. Maybe there is an excuse that I'm just not aware of. Or maybe I'm judging people too harshly. But please don't tell someone that you care about them, and then only contact them once in a while, when the guilt creeps around and you feel like you should.

Because no one don't needs friends like that.

And it especially hurts when you check your e-mail, seeing that there's one new, and finding that it's from Student Universe or Urban Outfitters, instead of from that person you were hoping to hear from. I blame myself, for giving a person such an important place in my life. Ideally, I could not hear from someone and it wouldn't hurt one bit. But the truth is, it hurts when I find myself thinking about someone a lot, and then I finally almost give up on hearing from that person, and they contact me again. And then I go back to hoping that new e-mails are from that person, that when my phone rings, it will be that person on the other line. Before you think I'm crazy, I don't want a thousand phone calls. Or a thousand e-mails. Or for someone to go broke over text messaging. But just a line, here or there.

And I guess this is my fault, for creating these expectations that people clearly weren't up to (for lack of ability or desire) meeting.

But the damage has been done. Because all that hurt, all that sadness during those times when I've hoped it was someone and it wasn't has built up. And it's hard to forget all of those times that I thought of someone...and then realized that you weren't thinking of me.

"I am far from attributing any part of Mr. Bingley's conduct to design, but without scheming to do wrong, or to make others unhappy, there may be error, and there may be misery. Thoughtlessness, want of attention to other people's feelings, and want of resolution, will do the business." - pride and prejudice

It's soooo true. I always feel sad when I see new messages in my inbox and they're just advertising a sale or something.
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