Thursday, October 06, 2005

 

day 1!

I had my first day of work today! It was wonderful. Quick schedule rundown of my day (since I know everyone is fascinated by the minutaie of my life): I met with Boss, she talked about the magazine and the position and tons of details that I forget, then I talked to my officemates (I share a room with two other people, a guy and a girl. they are very nice and approachable), was shown the very important vending machines and kitchen in the basement...

okay, so I just wrote out the rest of my day, read it and realized that it was boring even ME. The important thing is that they were very nice, I met a lot of people, and only did about a half hour of actual work. The office uses iChat to talk to one another, and it's especially useful because there are two deaf people working somewhere in the building. I was disappointed that no one sent me a hello, though.

While setting up the iChat for me, the IT guy asked if I had AIM. (hahaha if only he knew) I told him yes, and he SET IT UP for me. After my mom and dad talking time and time again about IM use and the office, I was shocked and thinking that this was some kind of sneaky trick. I hesitantly ventured "oh...but do they mind if I use it?" and he said "Ha! not at all!" On that note, Jason, I'm sorry I didn't respond when you IMed me! IT guy was still giving me the Mac tour.

So for a lesser girl, there were two potentially cripplingly embarrassing moments of my day, but I handled them with ease.

During situation one, I was sharing a space with Girl Co-worker because IT guy was sitting at my desk still working on my computer. We were having lunch, and I had my plate on the edge of her desk. I did a fantastic job of being neat, keeping my taquitos on the plate, not dripping sour cream everywhere.

Just as I was mentally patting myself on the back, I put on the cover. And turned the plate over, spilling rice onto my lap and the ground. I passed it off by going "whoops!" then picking it all up. After watching the train wreck that is me, girl co-worker said something that instantly told me that we'd get along just fine.

Her: Are you going to have the rest of your guacamole?
Me: No, but I double dipped, is that okay?
Her: Are you kidding? I don't care!

Awesome.

okay. And to preface the next thing, let's just say that I NEVER DO THIS. I'm practically a fanatic. I never forget.

But this time, I forgot to pull up my zipper. It must have been my hurry to meet my second boss or something, I don't know. Or maybe I was just distracted by the still fresh rice spilling incident.

It was down for approximately five minutes, during which time I saw Girl Coworker, Male Coworker, IT guy, and boss #2. I'm fairly sure that the first three people saw nothing, because there is a pretty good overlap of fabric and zipper. But looking back, I'm imagining them averting their eyes uncomfortably, avoiding looking at me.

Boss # 2 (a woman) DEFINITELY saw, since I realized after I was sitting down. Luckily I'm wearing dorky pink hawaiian flower undies, nothing too skanky. And I noticed about 10 seconds after sitting down, so I recovered fairly fast and pulled my sweater down over the area. And then when we stood up I *casually* held my folder over the problem area and pulled it up.

Very suave. Flash the boss on the first day.

But, my friends. Perhaps I'm so cool about this is because I was witness to one of the most embarrassing things ever right after coming in the door.

There was a girl sitting at the front desk and she clearly isn't the usual secretary. She was wearing jeans (it's not Friday!) and was a little unprofessional - didn't ask my name when I told her that I was there to see my boss. She goes to lead me to the elevator and while we're waiting for the ancient thing to lower itself down the shaft, I'm looking down at the folder she had just handed me. I'm conscious of someone else waiting with us, but I didn't even give the person a glance, I was so wrapped up in my nervousness. All of a sudden I hear something horrible. A horrendous breach of etiquette.

"Oh, are you pregnant?!"

The words left her mouth with such excitement, such stupidity. I looked up, aghast. I swiftly and surreptitiously cast a glance at the "pregnant" woman. She was wearing pink stretch leggings that went to her knees, and this flowery tentlike t-shirt. She definitely looked pregnant, but was OBVIOUSLY NOT.

oh, the horror.

Comments:
Wow, I'm so glad that's working out for you, especially since you can chat with me on AIM still while you're at work.

And hey, at least she didn't ask YOU if you were pregnant, that would be a lot worse. As a man, I have learned that you never ask a woman if she's pregnant unless you actually see a baby emerging from her at that moment.
 
There are two questions I will never ask a woman - both blew up in face: How old are you? Are you pregnant? Never, never, never...Hopefully a lesson was learned in the elevator today.
 
You have a great blog here! I will be sure to book mark you. I have a soul food recipe site. It pretty much covers soul food recipe related stuff. Check it out if you get time :-)
 
"So for a lesser girl, there were two potentially cripplingly embarrassing moments of my day, but I handled them with ease."

Haha, that must come from experience ;). But seriously, I'm glad things are going very well for you. One word of advice though, I wouldn't mention co-workers in a bad light. Guacamole girl story is okay, but with the jeans secretary girl things I'd keep my trap shut. You never know who might get your sn... and with that your blog address.
 
"So for a lesser girl, there were two potentially cripplingly embarrassing moments of my day, but I handled them with ease."

Haha, that must come from experience ;). But seriously, I'm glad things are going very well for you. One word of advice though, I wouldn't mention co-workers in a bad light. Guacamole girl story is okay, but with the jeans secretary girl things I'd keep my trap shut. You never know who might get your sn... and with that your blog address.
 
I'm not weird or anything, I just have an unhealthy obsession with avocado. Also, you mentioned a blog yesterday on the way to Recessions, and it's not all that hard to find if you know how to use an Internet (which I do).

Your story about the elevator woman made me think for a bit...it's really likely that the person in question was ACTUALLY pregnant. There is someone here who is theoretically pregnant and dresses like that (her baby is supposedly due in mid-November). You'd never know it, because she's always outside smoking(!!!) but they had a baby shower for her a couple days before you got here. Go figure.

Anyway, I friends-lock all my work posts, but I figured I'd give you my url (because turnabout is fair play). :)
 
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