Thursday, March 23, 2006


do I look fat in this?

waiter: can I get you something to drink?

me: A coke, please.

waiter: diet?


Seriously? That's some nerve to assume such a thing. Even if the most obese individual in the world were to sit at that table, one should never jump to such a conclusion. Poor form.
okay, not to preempt any more comments here (because, yes, comments are what I live for), but I feel as though I should elaborate so you guys aren't under the impression that I'm 150% insecure.

I think the majority of girls (and maybe guys?) my age drink diet coke. And certainly many of the people who work in the "Golden Triangle" (oooh) drink diet. And possibly make the assumption that if they order a soft drink beverage, the waiter should read their mind and know that they want diet. Because who doesn't drink diet? (just me and c-note, apparently.)

Also, if I'm going to read into his comment as saying "Wow, you fat cow. Ease up on the hi-cal beverages." I should also read into it the other way.

The other way being: "You are clearly a sophisticated woman who takes care of herself (evident by your stylish wardrobe and figure), and you must want a diet coke. I will check to make sure that you have not forgotten, in the flurry of ordering a light lunch during your busy and important day, to specify that you would prefer to lay your soft lips on a diet drink."

I'll take the latter, thank you!
I was there...the exchange was not pretty and allowed for several minutes of awkward science and dirty looks after the waiter walked away.

And I concur, Meg, that you do look smashingly stylish today.
Ugh, I HATE, I mean really really HATE when you say "coke please" someone responds with "diet?". No. If I wanted a diet coke I would have ordered it by saying "DIET coke please".

I like saying "Fat Coke".

Not that any Irish waiter/barperson has ever bothered clarifying.
I hate diet soda. It's like... bullets that kill you less? It's pointless, soda isn't meant to be healthy.
Of course he meant- "girl you're hot, you must drink diet coke"..
I drink regular coke too, I used to drink diet, but decided to cut down on drinking soft drinks and indulge in the real stuff when I decided to actually drink it.
I hate when I ask for a Coke and they bring me Pepsi. I'd hate it even more if it were a diet Pepsi.
Sorry I've never liked diet anything. It leaves a film on me tongue.
Give me the unbridled diabetes inducing goodness of the regular colas any day of the week.
This waiter sounds like an Ass though, not even worth the energy it takes to think about him.
He is a waiter after all.
In Italy they call it "Coca-Lite" and do that finger-pinching motion for "smaller." That always made me crack up...and I'd return with "no...coca-grande" and stretch my arms out as big as possible.

To continue with my alcoholic theme on your blog...if you order a beer instead, you don't run into these problems.
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