Thursday, September 18, 2008


quilting a blanket of seduction

My quilting class began this week — as dorky as it is, I was actually excited about "going back to school." Making new friends! Learning new skills! Being in a temple of education!

To be sure, most of my fellow quilters are on the other side of 60, but there's nothing like making friends of another generation, right? And I almost had a mental breakdown around 8 p.m. while trying to figure out the proper cutting techniques, but I'm blaming that on being a lefty. And though the local high school is hardly a temple, it's rather large and airy.

SIL and I picked out our fabrics the day before. The directions were a bit nebulous. We were told to get a dark fabric, a medium fabric, a light fabric with a design, and a lighter beige fabric that used the other colors, maybe in a small-scale pattern. It seemed like there were a lot of ways to go wrong, but somehow we each managed to pick something out.

I had flounced into JoAnn Fabrics planning on making this nice, sweet, demure and cozy quilt. I was picturing nice creams, maybe a little light pink flower or two, nothing with too much commotion. I was determined to take a "Project Runway" challenge and make a departure from my usual thing, you know? But after a lot of deliberating and switching bolts around, I walked out with this:
The gold fabric caused quite a stir in class. As I laid my find in front of the group, someone called out, "Oh a SEXY quilt!" and someone else teasingly asked if I was going to make "a nightie" with the leftover fabric. Another lady suggested that I make a pair of hotpants, and I said I'd make matching ones for the whole class. Muahaha.

How hilarious would it be if I made short little gold pj pants to match my quilt? I can only imagine a guy's face. I swear I'll make a pair if I have enough yardage left, just to make this ridiculous scene playing out in my imagination happen in real life.

Oooh! Oooh! You know the benefit of all these sweet, little ol' ladies? They all have adorable grandsons your age they want married off... and to who better than the cutie making the matching pants and quilt? They know you, they like you... it'd be perfect!


(Hey, it's better than Craig's List...)
I might have missed the boat on lady was talking about how her son just got married...another was talking about her two new grandkids.

That's it. Next time, I'm taking woodworking.
Woodworking would be good. I heard on the radio tonight on the drive home that the place women most often go to find husbands is the hardware store, so...
hah TC! So this might be best suited for email, but whatever.

So last class my sister-in-law and I got out early...and I saw that we were walking by the woodworking class, which was still in session.

I was craning my neck to see in, and sil was like "oh!! Be careful!!!"

There was a HUGE mess on the floor (maybe mountain dew? hopefully) and posters put down to make it more visible and while trying to spy on the 70-year-old hotties in there, I walked right through it. dammit!
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